down memory lane
not too long ago, year 2005, winter to late summer, i was assigned to do a transition project in the u.s. i was all over the map, flying and driving from state to state every week. but i do get to spend some time-off from work once in a while. just 3 years ago, in a suburb in philly with friends on a liberty bell tour. how i’ve changed…
yes, i looked like a kid, a gawky kid at that. i was always in my most comfortable. now you understand when i say that it isn’t always about comfort. i don’t know how it happened but i’ve changed a lot. most noticeably is my body. how i dress (dress up is a more fitting term), my demeanor, taste in food, even my habits. i am no longer that ‘kid’, but i will always be that person. the one outside looking inside the candy shop.
i can’t really express it into words. my friends have a front row seat on how and when, but not the why. even myself can’t think of the why, but i guess that is what we do, we change. for some it’s because of a specific experience or a person or even circumstances. i simply change because that is what i suppose to do. even now i’m still changing, and changing and changing. it’s a good change for me; i was able to drop that kid look in 3 years, and i no longer have to bring with me ids entering clubs a watching movies. but the thing is, i feel old, not because i look older. that part of me who’s silly, carefree, adventurous, the part who’s spontaneous and laughs unknowingly at myself is somewhat gone. everything is a calculated move as all grownup should do. you should be politically correct, sensitive to all issues…
times have changed; some positive, some not for the better. but that is all what we have, a spoonful of change to shake up your stale life.
listening to:
All The Best – Tina Turner: Proud Mary
