the randomness of dying
e all die alone. well it’s true. gregory house had something there when he said it. family maybe with you in your deathbed, crying, shedding buckets of tears (if you’re that good to them), wishing you’ll live longer, making sure you’ve signed your will, but you’re the one dying. as much as they want to cry and wail you to life, you’re the one who’ll meet your maker.
nd there’s nothing bad about that. who said dying alone is bad, or dying for that matter. would you have it that you die together with another person? i rather die alone, not miserable though, just alone. no one stealing my thunder, dying a more tragic way than i would; just imagine, competition even in death. that would be more tragic. …still a prima ballerina at dying. i don’t know why people are so afraid of dying. why be afraid? i’ve read a lot of materials saying that most people are afraid to die because they haven’t done all the things they want to. how would you know that you’ve done it all? create a checklist and tick against it? if only it were that simple. and we are that contented not to want what’s on the other side of the fence. you can never be prepared to die, you just can’t. if there’s one thing i’ve learned from dear ol’ life is that it’s unpredictable. it always throws you a curve ball at the most unexpected time. but don’t let this be your reason not to be ready for life; all we can do is to be ready as we can be, be on the top of our game and roll along with the punches. life would be less bitchy that way. and maybe, just maybe, we can be a little more prepared dying.
ately i’ve noticed that when i’m trying to compose a thought, my nimble fingers seemed to type by its own the phrase ‘i hate…‘ without me thinking of anything. i think it’s the negative and pessimistic side of me that is waiting, screaming to get out as if i’m not that negative yet. it seems that i’ve been hating for quite a while now. is this the universe telling me i am a bad person? honestly, i don’t know what to make out of it aside that i hate it, the feeling of hating. see! me being negative again, fuck! i need to move out of this zone, permanently. speaking of nimble fingers, i need a manicure pronto.
listening to:
Doll Domination – Pussycat Dolls: Bottle Pop
Tags: introspect
